He takes my breath away..

Literally... there comes a point while ‘submitting’ when i like to stand my ground, yes i am stubborn, well i am a taurean, we’re well known for it apparently. Sometimes i like to be forced to surrender, its kinda like a game to me to see who can go furthest. Will it be me, or will it be him that gives up first? Generally speaking its usually the geezer who gives up.... not much fun when you need someone who will push you and take you beyond that what you have already experienced. How can you submit to a man who won’t go as far as you? You cant....... well i cant.
I have been fortunate to have found that one.... i kinda knew i had met my match the time he tried to hang me, my reluctance to beg to be released resulted in him winching me ever higher. He wasn’t going to give in so I relented in the end, begging to be brought down in amongst the gasping....fucking hardest thing i have ever done, so humbling... it was quite an amazing experience actually begging for your life on the verge of tears, the realisation that for once someone will go way beyond what you will.
Tonight i felt quite defiant.....even more stubborn than usual... tonight i wasn’t going to give up without a fight; i’ll show you i thought. I was bound in a rather strange position, my arms out wrists and forearms secured to a pole with leather straps, my legs secured to the floor wide open. The ligature was then slipped over my head.... i felt him close to me as i felt the ligature tighten, “you’re not coming out of this until you beg to be taken to the bench” we’ll see i thought, i hate begging.... to me it seems pathetic, yanno when you see all those snivelling creeps begging ... i will not stoop to that level... he tightens more and i have the most strange sensation in my head.... its really odd, you go dizzy and you feel yourself wobbling.... “No” i gasp..... “you know what you have to do” he informs me.... “ i don’t, i don’t” i respond in my best damsel in distress voice ... well anything has got to be better than begging right? So he kindly reminds me. He tightens the ligature more, my head feels woozy again, it’s such a strange feeling i really cannot describe it... a sensation of losing control yet all in the head, you don’t even feel the restriction around your throat, nor are you aware of the gasping as you fight for your breath, the only thing you’re aware of is this sensation that is happening in your head.... i don’t recall how long this went on for.... i just recall him slacking off the ligature as he was supporting my body from behind. I thought i had won.... i thought i had finally gone further than he would.... but alas no it would seem he had won after all.... he had made me pass out and it was his full intention to do so....

It would seem funny though, breath play isnt my thing, and it isnt his thing yet we seem to be exploring this together rather alot.... im just a little worried where these dangerous games will leave us... i will never find another who can do to me what this man does... and how far will he go?

Im lost now... lost in the world of the uber and i have every intention of staying there while he will allow me.....